welcome to october let’s get spooky (idea courtesy of becca)
What does a white dick even look like
I’m on mobile is this robin thicke
please tell me that they are both in a relationship
the speech impediment of the 21st century (by Marc Johns)
I’ll fuck you up buddy this is not a speech impediment it’s linguistic evolution!! the existence of the phrase “Aisha was like” allows the speaker to convey whatever Aisha said without making the listener assume they’re quoting Aisha directly while still maintaining the FEELING of what Aisha said.
ie, Aisha said she didn’t want to go out with me VERSUS Aisha was like, “I’d rather kiss a Wookie”.
the addition of “XYZ was like” lets the speaker be more expressive and efficient and it is a totally valid method of communicating information!!
With the way language has evolved, this is one of the few ways I can even think of to express in casual conversation what someone said.
"So I said to Aisha," is certainly used, but if you remove the "so," which implies casual tone ("and" can be used in the same way), you get
"I said to Aisha," which is really formal in most English dialects/variations. I don’t know about all, but in New England dialects, you sound like you’re reading aloud from a novel.
"I told Aisha," is really only used when you continue to describe, not tell, what you told her. Ex: "I told Aisha that James was too punk for her" works while, "I told Aisha, ‘James is too punk for you’" crosses the line back into formalness of the "I said."
Things like “I asked” or “I answered [with]” are similar levels of casual and efficient to the “So, I said [or say, as many conversations about the past take place in present tense anyway, as if the speaker is giving a play-by-play in the moment]” but are specific to only certain situations.
"I was like, 'Marc Johns, what is your obsession with restoring archaic speech patterns and interfering with the natural progression of English from complex to efficient?'" envelopes all of these easily and is accessible and crisp, and allows for more variations on inflection than the others.
Of course, James is probably like, “I already fucking said that.” But eh, I tried adding on.
And Tyrion’s just like “Respect.”
If anyone can appreciate the value of a well delivered backhanded compliment, it’s Tyrion.
people who scream when the teacher turns off the lights
If you’re lesbian and you fall for a guy
If you’re gay and you fall for a woman
If you’re bisexual and you have a preference for girls
If you’re bisexual and you have a preference for guys
If you’re pansexual and have a preference
What’s not fine is telling someone they can’t love another person because it doesn’t fit into the confinements of a label.
If you’re asexual and get attracted to someone somehow.
so apparently an arm can sell on the black market for $885, ($500 for the shoulder plus $385 for the hand an forearm)
and a leg can sell for $500 (at least thats the lowest price of an albino leg so im guessing here)
So when someone says “That’ll cost an arm ad a leg” they are roughly asking for $1,335
which is less than i would have guessed.
i didn’t spend this much time researching the cost of limbs on the black market for one note
Some church signs make people burst out in laughter rather than causing them to reflect on their life.
#7 had me cracking up!
So effing funny ahah